Back I Go

Last year, I saw a nutritionist for a little while.  She was wonderful and I loved her.  There were some insurance issues, however, that precluded me from continuing.  Luckily, my insurance company has realized that dealing with and figuring out how to maintain a healthy weight is actually a good investment of health dollars.

So today, I went back.  It was a good appointment.  I was able to articulate what I want in a way I don't think I had been able to do before.  I talked to her at length about "the switch" that I seem to have in my mind, the one where I see myself differently and get into an imaginative space that translates thinking into doing.  The example I used (and really the only one I have) is stopping smoking.  Yes, I was a smoker for a while, which horrified and angered my parents intensely since I'd had underdeveloped bronchial tubes as a preemie and was in and out of the hospital for breathing-related problems.  I tried to quit for years, for all the usual reasons.  And, for all the usual reasons, it was difficult.  Until the time I quit.

I had to perform an imaginative exercise that allowed me to see myself as a non-smoker.  What would my life look like without cigarettes?  What would I do while I drank my tea, commuted to work, talked on the phone, took a break from my desk?  Where would I turn when I was stressed?  How would I relax?  How would I celebrate?  How would I think?   When I figured those things out, it truly was like a switch had been turned off.  I didn't have any cravings for cigarettes, not even physical cravings.  From that day this, I've started smoking two cigarettes -- one to be companionable with a friend I hadn't seen in long time, and one in reaction to a particularly stressful visit by a relative.  But I didn't finish either one -- and didn't enjoy the one or two drags I had from each.  I just wasn't a smoker any more.

So, I need to do that exercise with being a healthy person.  What would my life look like as a healthy person who had a healthy relationship to food and to my body?  What would I eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner?  What would I snack on?  How would I deal with temptation?  What would I choose in a restaurant?  What kind of exercise would I do every day?  How would it feel not to have pain?  How would it be to not have to think about what I can't do or what I want to avoid because I feel awful?  When I get into that imaginative space, I am confident that the rest will fall into place with work, of course.

The first concrete step I am taking is this:

A glass of water.  8 times a day.  At least.

The second concrete step is this:

Doesn't that look like a healthy person's haircut?

Where Your Mind Is, There Shall Your Body Go Also*

The other day, I  got an email from one of my favorite online resources, Heather K. Jones. The title intrigued me for sure, so I had to click on the link. What I found astounded me:




How did this woman get into my head? How does she know the script? I started taking notes, which I titled, "be a conscious thinker".  Here they are, reproduced without correction. I think it's telling how I can't even SPELL the word positive when I'm typing quickly.

be a conscious thinker. 

Directing your thoughts in a positive direction as often s you can.

Most people set a goal and assume thye’ll be happy when they get there. 

Are you constantly thinking bout what a struggle it is, how hard it is to lose weight and how mch you have to lose and how it’s always been difficult to you.

OR are you thinking

How far you have come

How much you have learned. 

How you know you have the tools to et where you want to go

How awesome it will feel once you get there.

ARE you thinking:

Are you constantly complaining about your body and how it doesn’t fit into the clothese you want and doesn’t do what you want

OR are you thinking about all the great things your body does for you every day to keep you alive?

Are you in a negative place or a poisitive place?

How to get t the poisitive place.  Negative energy keeps you stuck where you are?

How can you switch to a more positive mode?

I'm eagerly awaiting Heather's next installment.  In the meantime, I actually bit the bullet and bought her "What's Your Diet Type" ebook series.  I found out that I am what she calls a "Diet Feeler".  When I read the challenges that this personality type to my sister, she just laughed because they were all so true of me.

‣ Ignoring Your Own Needs

‣ Emotional Eating

‣ Denial of Your Health Issues

‣ Social Food Struggles

‣ Trouble Staying Self-Motivated

‣ Low Self-Esteem

‣ Waiting for “Tomorrow”

So far, it's been interesting and enlightening.  I like Heather's approach, probably because I have discovered about myself that this whole thing is in my head and is playing itself out on the field of my body. 

I also like the association Heather has with Gina Homulka of Skinnytaste.  In fact, I'm so incredibly motivated that I actually had her "Avocado Egg Salad" for lunch.  This will be shocking to anyone who knows me. I hate mayonnaise with a passion (I actually don't have any in the house at all and left it out of this recipe) and I also hate avocados... so much so that it's a joke between some friends and me that they serve avocado every time I see them because they really don't like me very much. I chose to try this recipe because I've been hearing for years that avocados are good for you.  This was actually quite good and I'd planned to have it for lunch tomorrow too, but Chickadee #2, in a zeal of "helping out" while I was working this afternoon, emptied the leftovers into the trashcan.


*Sorry, Jesus, for cribbing your line about God and Mammon:  "Where your treasure is, there shall your heart be also"